“My animalistic senses tell me that the nose is particularly exquisite, bub.”
imagine after first contact with the vulcans there were all kinds of programs for cultural exchange so you had a bunch of vulcan ambassadors being shown prime examples of the human cultural experience and one of those examples was a group of vulcans being taken to the superbowl just standing there in their proper vulcan robes in between half naked humans with their faces painted, shouting and waving giant foam hands, and the vulcans were given giant foam hands, and they were like ‘what in surak’s name is this’
Vulcan ambassadors at a rock concert
Vulcan ambassadors at Oktoberfest
Vulcan ambassadors getting lost in The Mall of America
Vulcan ambassadors appearing as special guests on various talk shows including Ellen, Oprah, and the Late Late show with Craig Ferguson
Vulcan ambassadors writing research reports upon the bizarre human phenomena of “reality tv shows” even though these shows clearly do not represent an authentic reality
Vulcan ambassadors being persuaded to wear snuggies and eat popcorn and watch The Wizard of Oz
vulcan ambassadors on roller coasters, picking up their mid-ride photographs after, all of their faces like “:|” next to the humans beside them all “:O!”
vulcan ambassadors observing human fans of boy bands, wondering what about their pheromones could possibly cause such mass hysteria
vulcan ambassadors taken to halloween parades, where humans are dressed up as vulcans
vulcan ambassadors treated to a stack of pancakes for the first time
vulcan ambassadors becoming addicted to comic books, memorizing every plot point and retcon
vulcan ambassadors at a water park. they do not trust it.
Vulcan ambassadors at SDCC
Vulcan ambassadors on a road trip from Canada to Mexico stopping at every major monument on the way taking confused pictures next to the world’s largest ball of yarn
Vulcan ambassadors at a Pride Parade being surrounded by a mob of humans displaying expressions of affection out in public
Vulcan ambassadors shopping in Hot Topic
Vulcan ambassadors at a crowded beach and theres no room to set up a towel and their traditional robes are getting all sandy and it smells of beer and sunscreen and there’re are so many almost naked bodies they can barely see either sand or water
Vulcan ambassadors ordering pizza delivered and counting down the 30 mins and when the pizza person arrives well before their allotted time is up they’re so surprised and delighted they tip them like $50 terran dollars
Vulcan ambassadors eating an oreo for the first time and then promptly being told to smother the next oreo in peanut butter and dip it in milk
Vulcan ambassadors being invited to a Lord of the Rings extended edition marathon and assuming the group of humans they were watching with regarded the movies as religious myths and the watching of them was akin to a sacred annual ritual and being so flustered and honored to be invited but then getting so confused when the two girls sitting closest to the screen spent the entire three movies making crude comments about the backsides of whichever religious figure was being portrayed on the screen
Vulcan ambassadors at Disney Land during a holiday and being reminded of The Beach
Vulcan ambassadors at Disney World during a holiday and getting a little bit lost and separated and they were told to ask a cast member for help but they didn’t realize that all employees are technically cast members so one Vulcan ambassador waits in the ridiculously long line to see Lilo to ask for some directions to Tomorrow Land please I seem to have lost my group and I am having trouble deciphering the map it seems the attractions are not to scale
modern day shakespeare adaptions that should exist
- southern gothic macbeth. the bloody, brutal themes of the play in the suffocating atmosphere of the genre. the imagery of lady macbeth’s hands dripping with blood! the witches! macbeth’s madness when he believes the swamp has actually come to life to kill him! it’s like it was made for this play
- political othello. make him secretary of defense or state. imagine a house of cards like environment. addresses issues of current racism and misogyny in politics, and Iago’s jealous/obsessive love for Othello with very clear homo-erotic undertones. like extremely explicit and how that translates in such a masculine setting to understand Iago’s intent.
- police hamlet. hamlet senior as the deputy in nyc. his mysterious death draws his son home from stanford/harvard/what-have-you. a modern day noir-like detective mystery. emphasis on ophelia’s depression and subsequent decent into madness by popping too many pills. the way the “respectful” upper-class tear themselves apart splashed all across the media.
- the tempest as lost.
- titus andronicus as a proper horror movie, set in the current war in the middle east.
- college midsummer nights dream. the fairyland is a popular night club. lots of dubstep music and drugs slipped in dark corners of the dance floor.
specky: a good example that australian football is far superior to american one or even european ‘classic’ football/soccer
For those of you wondering: yes, this is a legal move, and is actually very commonly used in Aussie Rules - launching yourself off other players (even opposing teams) in order to snatch the ball out of the air.
And no pads. Like, these dudes do this shit without any protective gear that I’m aware of. How are they not all in traction?
CHECK OUT HER LEGS. Peggy Carter moves so wonderfully—stalking along so her shoulders and hips stay level all the way through her stride, one foot landing before the other takes off, knees slightly bent so she can spring forward or absorb a blow, back foot sweeping up around the lead to make sure she’s smooth and steady.
This is a fencer’s walk. This walk tells me: Peggy knows how to use a sword.
I bet you that somewhere at home, packed in with all the other relics of her school years, there is a small silver cup from a women’s epée tournament with her name on it.
Captain America AU
AU Where Steve survives the war, but the serum begins to lose it’s potency and degrade in him system and he reverts back to normal. He is now in full health, but no longer has his post human abilities. He tries to fight in the Korean War, but feels he is a liability without his abilities, so resigns his commission.
He still wants to help and inspire people so he uses his fame to start a TV show for children. He doesn’t want to be associated with war and violence so the producers can’t call it the Captain America show.
So Steve puts on a cardigan and calls the show “Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood”
I hate you. Why would you think of something like this??
Donna Meagle is my life inspiration
MY GIRL DONNA
Steve Rogers and Keladry of Mindelan would get along so well.
…YES. YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS OMG YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Remember that movie in which Jack Black was a teacher and building a rock band and when a little black chubby girl asked to be a singer he only said “sure! let me hear you” and the moment she started using her beautiful voice his lit up like all of his dreams came true, PLUS the same little girl was scared that people would make fun of her because she was fat and he started listing awesome singers with some weight on and included himself and told her that people wouldn’t laugh because she is awesome at what she does and that is all that matters PLUS that it’s ok to enjoy food?
Also, when a little boy asked to be the band’s stylist he just said “sure, go ahead fancy pants” like, there wasn’t a single second of questioning it, he went into “ok, that will be your position then” right away
That fucking movie is an hour and a half of Jack Black teaching kids to love themselves disregarding all of the stereotypes
Inquiring minds want to know… is Matt Bomer a good kisser?
PREACH. Beard burn is the worsssssst